"there was a child who was born to be the one who comforts me; who grew up strong and brave and holy, loves me rough and tenderly"

[ "Promise to Me" - Mirah ]

mmmm. such a good song.

so i'm still working on a pretty big entry on prayer.. i've been under the weather as of late (i rarely ever get sick- literally, maybe once a year but when i do it really tends to kick my ass).
but baruch Hashem! glory be, i'm getting better. slowly, but surely. (i usually opt for a natural-heal route- you obviously need to be more patient but i believe it's worth it)


was pretty shaken up yesterday. one of the clients (can't release names or domain urls or anything in case it gets taken to court. doubtful, since there's not a lot of legal evidence- see below) got suspended because we got a notice from our colo/datacenter (off-site server farm, has better cooling/humidity control/etc. for storing the hardware) about child porn. the thing's still under internal investigation so i can't say a WHOLE lot.

so anyways, i have to follow up with these notices- check them over, make sure they're valid, etc. and i've read the laws on it- no sexual acts depicted, no nudity (characterized in the legal sense as display of gentialia- and breasts, too, i think). and then the standard stuff- no bestiality, etc.

well, these photos weren't porn in the legal sense- but trust me. they were porn. when there's a photo of a girl ("models" the website calls them) OBVIOUSLY under 18 (without QUESTION. and i usually think people are older than they really are) dressed in skimpy/revealing clothing, reclining seductively and acting coy, and this site sells mysterious DVD's... yep, to me that's child porn. hi, exploitation.

so as of now he's still suspended (meaning the server is shut down and locked, and the websites don't work) and pending review by upstream. i think at the LEAST he'll get booted because we've had numerous issues with him over the years. so even though he won't get taken to court (see now why i have no faith in our judicial system?) or anything, we'll probably at least drop him.

i hope so; i really want to have no part in contributing to that.

please pray for:
-the girls: that they have healing and seek more fulfilling and less dangerous pursuits for fulfilling the desire to be loved
-their families: that they learn of what's going on and pursue legal action (since the girls are minors, it'd be VERY easy to make this a civil case and win it instead of make it a federal/state case and lose it), and they heal
-me: i don't ever want to have to be confronted with something like that again, ever. it's like watching someone get shot in the face; i literally felt ill. peace has come to me since, but that doesn't mean i'm "over" it or want to have to confront it again.
-the company: that we act responsibly and can his ass. at the very least lock his account and ban him.
-him: we are called to forgive, no matter what. while i think it's horrible what he did/does, that doesn't mean i don't want him (and HIS "clientele") to be healed of their darkness. please pray He's shown truth and has his heart softened to what he's doing to these girls and their families.

thank you all; Y'shua bless you.